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Wednesday, July 23, 2008
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A Punjabi Sardar and a Bengali Babu were talking about their State's patriotichistory during the freedom struggle. The debate heated up and both ended up claimingthat their state had the maximum number of freedom fighters. They finally agreed on a method to find which of the states had more freedom fighters.Each person would say the name of a freedom fighter from his state and pull one hairout of...
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Bantu returns from his first day at school and immediately questions his father." Dad, today we had a Spelling Class -All the other kids could only say half the alphabet, but I knew the whole thing. Is that because I am Sardar?" "No son, that's because you are intelligent. "Bantu seeming content with the answer, asks his father another question, "Dad, today we had Math class - All the other kids could...
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There was this Bihari who was travelling with two ticketsWhen the T.T.E asked for the ticket, this fellow gave both the tickets, and so the T.T.E asked him the reason of buying two tickets.This fellow answered well what will happen if in case I lose one of them,so the T.T.E said what if you lose both of them,so this guy said then why do I have a monthly p...
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A Haryanavi peasant came to the office of The Hindustan Times to place an advertisement announcing his father's death."The rate is Rs. 360 per single col. cm," the clerk told him."Main to lut jaoonga - I 'll be ruined," exclaimed the Haryanvi."My father was 182 cms ta...
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A sophisticated city person comes to Haryana. He has this mistaken notion that rural people are simple and can be made fools of easily. He asks lift from a Sikh farmer on bullock cart, saying "O paaji, sanu Singapore jana hega, twadi belgaddi le chalugi menu otthon?"Farmer says, "Oye aaja, be jaa".Hearing this, the city person is momentarily shocked and asks "Ketthon beyaan?"The farmer replies, "Ae...
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Ek jat doosre jat sey,"Arre tanney bera ke Hanuman bhi jat tha?"Doosra bolya, " Tanne kyunkar bera patya?"Pehley alla bolya,"Lugai to ram ki kho gayi thi aur aag Hanuman ne apni poonch mein lagwa li! Jat ke bagair aur koi issa kam kar sakk hai?"______________________________________________________________Ek shehri babu ek gaon ke mollad se rasta bujhan lagya.Mollad bolya, "Nu kar tu yahan te khabhe...
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Teli aur jat ki is baat pe kaha suni ho gayi ke kaun ghana syana se. Dona ke beech shayari ka muqabla ho gaya. Pehelan teli ki baari thi. Usne sunaya, "Jat re jat, tere sar pe khat."Jat ne apna dimag top gear main thok diya aur bolya, "Teli re teli, tere sir pe kohlu."Teli bolya, "Arre jat ya to koi baat nahi bani."Jat bolya, "Na banne, sasurre bojh taley to dab ke marega."______________________________________________________________Ek...
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Thursday, July 17, 2008
Tau ne sikhi english
Once Chautala thought that he should teach english to his father . He started teaching from A for Apple B Bhains ( Buffalo) etc etc. When he came to M he said M for Mummy or 'Maa'. Proceeding further when W came Tau said ," Yaa kimi Jaani Phchani lage hai". (It seen that he has seen it some where). Then he recollected ," HAA, YAA SAI TO CHAUTALA KE MAA PER YAA ULTI KAYUN HOO RAHI SAI".( Yes, It is...
Tau on The Bus
Once Tau boarded a buss. Bus was very much crowded. On looking around tau found dirvers seat vacant and quickly grabbed it. After some time the dirver came and asked Tau to vacate the seat. Tau as usual refused to part with the seat. The driver politely said, "Tau mene Bus chalani sai"( I have to drive the Buss). Tau replied," To phir mere sir pe baith ke chalawega, pechay baith ke nahi chalai jati"...
Tau or chor
Once a thief broke in to Tau's house and successfully completed his operation. In the morning when tau wake up he went to police station for lodging an FIR.The policeman asked : "Tau ke Bkhat Tha"( Tau what was the time).Tau :" Bhai Bkaht to mada ey tha, taien to yeh rasey ho gaye" (The time was bad, that's why this trouble happened).The policeman :" Tau Bajya ke tha"( Tau what was the time).Tau answered:"...
Tau Sadak pe
Once a Tau was gonig on the road. A car wala blew horn from behind. Tau looked back asked the dirver," Ya sadak ke tere BAAP ki Sai ?" ( Does this road belongs to your father ?). The dirver replied in annoiance ,"HAA". Tau immediately replied ," Apne BAAP se keh de sadak thorii CHOREE karva de ga, Yoo Tau na halley".( Say your father to broaden the road as this Tau wouldn't move asid...
Tau ne dekhi sholey
One day Tau went to see Sholey. Veru was tied up and Gabber said,"Nach Basanti Nach". Veru screamed," Nahen Basanti..., en Kutto ke samney mat Nachna".(No Basanti don't dance in front of these dogs.) Tau who was watching the movie very curiously exclaimed ," Nachegi Kyuna, Pandra rupiye nu he thora na de rakhe Saien". (Why would not she dance, I have not given fifteen rupees in vai...
Tau ka Meheman
One day a guest came to Tau's house at night. Tau thought that he has to prepare food and serve to the guest, so what to do to aviod this at mid-night. He think upon a plan. He asked the guest,Tau:" Ha bahi Roti to Khawega"? ( Ok then, you would take food?)Guest: Haan Tau Roti to khani sain. (Yes Tau I would take food)Tau: Kitni Roti kha liya kara. (How many Chapatis you can eat)Guest: "Tau Teen"....
Jokes of haryana
Akhbaar wala ek haryanavi filmon ke hero ka interview leve tha. Uste poochan lagya,"Jungle mein thaare aage sher aaje to tum ke karoge?"Hero bolya,"Arre manne ke karna se, pher to jo bhi karega woh to susra sher he karega!"______________________________________________________________Ek mota sa seth ka chhora doosre chhore ke uppar chaddha bethya aur usney dhad dhad chhetan lag raya aur saath mein...